Your way is your way and they can’t dictate it for you. They can try. You can even allow them to have the power. Despite all they will do and say, your way will still be your unique way.
I’m sure it will surprise you to find out I have often walked to the beat of my own drum.
But there was a time when I tried it the way they told. Actually, there were several times I found into the trap they offered.
One of the times I remember best for falling into the trap of they happened in junior high school. For the longest time, I was just me. My aunt would cut my hair when she visited and she kept it simple and easy. It was long enough that it stayed up in a ponytail or braids.
And then she moved to town. She had moved from the “big” city and she had lots of ideas about how things were supposed to be. I listened. I followed. I changed.
It didn’t take me long to realize that her way was not my way. It wasn’t that her way was bas or wrong. It was just that she was WAY more girlie than I ever wanted to be. Even when I was little, and my mother bought me a canopy bed, I wanted it to be monkey bars.
That was just how I was – and how I still am to some extent.
I have known some things I prefer and some ways I lean more naturally, but I’ve also learned from experience things that don’t work and some things that work better.
I’ve had to be okay with my way even when others around me didn’t understand.
Questions to Find Your Way
What is the most comfortable way to get things done? I’m a list maker, but I don’t have to check off all the items on my list to feel accomplished. My husband is a list maker, but if he doesn’t check off everything from his list then he feels like he failed. When I make lists for around the house, I give him one with the top three things and I keep the rest of the list to myself. It allows us both to work in the way that is most comfortable to our unique journey.
What stresses you out? It is just as important to know what is stressful as it is to know what is comfortable. I don’t mind doing things for myself. I’m willing to try if for nothing other than the learning experience. Other people stress out over the thought of DIY. It is better to farm out what stresses you out than to let the stress block your way.
How can you utilize your comfort place in other ways? In other words, how can you take your natural tilt and put it to work for you? The other day, I was playing a game on my device, while I was watching a show with my husband, and I reprimanded him for making faces at me. “How do you do that?” He wanted to know how I could see what he was doing while doing the other things. That gift of multi-tasking little things has allowed me to do work while hanging out in online chats or taking a class. I try to be sure that my multi-tasking practice doesn’t interfere with others, but I also try to find as many ways as possible to put it to work.
Your way is the only way for you. They will try to distract you, sometimes to hold you back and sometimes in an attempt to help you. They don’t know your way.
Invest in finding your way and you will set the foundation for living your why.
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