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How to Become a Good Wife

I am a good wife – in my mind anyway. I want to do the things that will push me to the head of the class. I want to cook three meals a day, keep the house spick and span, and entertain. It just seems that my wants have a hard time keeping up with reality.

There are those weeks that I make it for several days doing everything that I know to do – and doing it when I know to do it. Then I hit that bad day when I can’t get anyone or anything to cooperate. Those are the days I find myself calling the hubby on his way home. “Could you pick up some supper?

Defeated and deflated, it can take me days or weeks to get back on track. Does a good wife ever find herself pondering the idea “what about me?” Or am I the only one out there who selfishly wants to focus on me and me alone?

I refuse to give up. I know that being a good wife is not just a pipe dream. It is something that is attainable. Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results is not the answer. I need to keep changing. Molding and tweaking the way I do things will help me find the path I need to take.

Getting Better at Being a Good Wife

  • I will continue to make a schedule, but I will change the details each month until I find one that fits the pattern and life of my family.
  • I will continue to make a list of things that need to be done, but I will be willing to let things slide completely or at least trust someone else to do the ones that must be done.
  • I will continue to push myself to be more, but I will plan for a day or weekend of relaxation where I recharge my mind, body, and attitude.
  • I will continue to expect perfect attempts, but I will also expect less than perfect results. Reality is not as simple as the imagination. I have to allow myself, and those around me, the flexibility of mistakes. It€™s the trying and doing that is most important. If there is still a cobweb in the corner after the dusting is done, the world will not implode.


Being a good wife is about pushing me to be. It’s not just about the house or the family, although those things will naturally be affected by what I become. As I push myself to grow, I will fall into the pattern of being more to those around me. As I grow me, I will become the good wife I want to become.

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  • Just Me,

    I think that we have all been where you are as far as feeling empty in our roles. The answer is not with another man. My best friend from college is a guy, but I would NEVER take my problems to him about my husband. There are a few, trusted female friends that I might talk with, but that is all. If I MUST talk to someone, then I take it to God. He always has the right answer (even if it’s one I don’t want to hear).

    The truth is that you are the only one responsible for your feelings. It’s not your husband’s job to make you happy or satisfied. Instead of worrying about what he is or isn’t doing, try finding out where your lack of satisfaction is coming from.